How To Prevent Your Child From Hitting Their Sibling?
Children usually want their wishes to be fulfilled at the earliest. If you do not give them that toy or chocolate, then they will throw a tantrum. They will scream, cry or even hit. Young children also lack impulse control, so when frustrated and cannot get what they want as a stimulus-response, they may hit or bite. This behavior is quite common among siblings. If the older sister takes the doll from her young sister, the younger child will lash out her fingernails at her. Then the elder sibling retaliates as an eye for an eye seems to be the appropriate way of handling situations from their perspective.
Siblings hit or kick each other when they don’t know how to vent their feelings or handle a problem. Although this behavior is not acceptable, it is only natural. But how do we help our children manage their emotions so they can manage their behavior? Giving your undivided attention to your children is not enough to change their behavior. To understand them, we need to build trust and create a safe space for them to talk about any feelings they have been bottling up inside.
How can we do this?
Sometimes your older child fears that he isn’t good enough compared to the younger one. This grief of having lost his unique place in your heart turns into anger. Help him get past him anger and fears that lie beneath. Let them know that you love both the children equally. They mean the world to you and will always be your most precious little gem.
Sit your older child and encourage him to strengthen the bond with his sibling. You can play games with them in which the two of them team up against the parents. This way, they will be able to find many similarities and learn to play in harmony. Help each one to understand their sibling and encourage them to make cards or origami for each other. Make sure to reduce the conflict in every single way.
When your child hits their sibling in your presence, first make sure to hold and comfort the child who has been hit. Do not rage at the child who hit. The only way to do so is to sit and listen to both sides of the story. Once the situation has calmed down, parents can explain that it is not the right way to exert their feelings and that there are consequences for their actions. You might even need to wait a few hours to have this conversation but make sure you explain it to them calmly.
Before you start teaching your child what she has done wrong, address their feelings. This way, you are helping them process their feelings and, they can act the way they know they should have.
Avoid blaming your child when he hurts his sibling. Holding your child responsible for his behaviour could backfire. If you give him a speech about what he’s done, might scare him. The fear of losing your attention and love and might make him feel terrible and lonely. You can help your child develop empathy by pointing out the effect of hitting their sibling. Tell them constantly that hitting can hurt people physically and emotionally until they understand it. You could create a hypothetical situation so that your child can understand the feelings the person goes through when they are hurt. This way, your child will make sure to think before hitting their sibling and stop themselves from doing so.
Children learn from what they see. When you lash out or rage at your children with anger, they may assume that it is okay for them to do the same.
Though children love their siblings immensely, sometimes they fail to show their affection. Lending them a helping hand would give them a better perspective and understand that they never meant any harm. As parents, you can take them back to memory lane about the things they liked about each other. These minute efforts may create an enormous change in them. After all, a parent only wants their children to forge a deep connection and stay by each other’s side till eternity.
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